Sunday, February 06, 2005

What does it all mean?

I've been contemplating my shortening time here on our great blue marble. I look at what I've done and what I haven't done and I'm not satisfied. Don't get me wrong, I have incredible experiences, a family I love more than anything, great relationships, a job that fulfulls me, I've climbed mountains, canoed peaceful rivers, dove on the reefs of Honduras and Belize . . . but . . . Is that all there is? When I honestly look at the sum of my life it comes up short. So just what am I looking for?

I've really started down the path I was on in my youth and 20s. That path was focused on the spirtual quest to know self and know God.

Do you know how getting back on that path feels? Have you ever gone back to some old stomping grounds?; A place from your childhood or college days that you loved but thats been off the radar of your life. You go back and easily slide into the familiar groove. It's not solid or absolute, it feels kinda dreamlike, but you know your way. Well, that's how I feel getting back on the path of spirituality. My meditations have quickly gotten deeper, my thought processes have become more and more peaceful and God centered. The touch of God in my life has become more easily apparent. I'm more frequently at peace.

For me, this is what life is all about. This is what it means.

This is the quest that we all yearn for but it's so easy to get sidetracked. Pressures to succeed and pressures to get connected, buy a car, get a house, have kids. I've always been looking for the next thing. I thought if only I had a ___________, life would be perfect. But I'd get that thing and life was the same! And I'd desperately search for that next thing whatever it was. I was like a hamster on a wheel. Always running in the same place not realizing I was going nowhere. Then one day I had the realization that we are exactly where we are supposed to be! There is nowhere to go but here. There is nowhere to look but inward. We have everything we need in life within.

The time to open my eyes is now. The time to make a difference in life is now. The time to serve others and God is in the ever present now.


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